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Declare Your Career Independence

Happiness is something that most of us strive for, and in fact, feel that we deserve to have. After all, our Declaration of Independence references “certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” And more often than not, we make happiness interchangeable with success—from getting a new car, to the watch on our wrist, the deal we closed, or the promotion we earned. But, I’m sure you realize, it is not really true that success breeds happiness…perhaps it is more accurate that happiness breeds success?

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creative diverse career woman

How do you resonate with success? A person who lives masterfully is a person whose mindset automatically attracts the right people, places, events, and opportunities, and the same mindset that allows the person to jump all over those opportunities with gusto, and without fear or hesitation. Ironically, while it takes a lot of effort to become a master in what you do on a daily basis, there is no real effort necessary in the thing we can truly master, which is being who we are.

It's not what you do that matters, nor as much how you do it. Mastery is about knowing who you really are, and how you express that in what you do. Self-Mastery is a really luxurious way of saying that we are living an abundant, fulfilled, and enjoyable life. It means feeling in control without having to control anything or anyone. As a master, it means you are at the cause, instead of the effect of your life. In future blog posts, we'll look at many things that get in the way of discovering and sharing our true selves. One by one, we'll identify those obstacles, limitations, and challenges and reveal them for what they are... distractions that can be rendered powerless through awareness and Self-Mastery. We'll help you to transform and mold your world into all that you desire, to reveal your unlimited potential.

There’s no happiness at work?

What does it mean to pursue happiness? When we think of pursuing something, we usually mean that we’re going after something we don’t already have. In Marci Shimoff’s book, Happy for No Reason, she points out, “to pursue something meant to practice that activity, to do it regularly, to make a habit of it.” There’s a huge difference between chasing after happiness and practicing happiness. When we chase after happiness, we’re coming from a perspective of lack or absence– we don’t have the thing that we want. But when we practice happiness, we’re active participants in making ourselves even happier.

So how can we practice happiness in our career?

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What is about your work that you are at the effect of or feeling victimized by? Is it the pay? Is it your boss or coworkers? Is the work boring, unchallenging, or unfulfilling? Are your talents underutilized? Maybe it is something else for you. If your answer to one or more is “damn right” or a simple yes, then consider how you felt when you answered in the affirmative. The first key is to know that you can weather the storms we know as moods. Like the weather, your moods are always changing. Recognizing and accepting your moods and knowing that they will change is important to “being happiness.” What kind of mood are you in when you’re at work?

If you realize this, when you are up, you can fully appreciate the moments of pure pleasure. Instead of being disappointed when your great mood doesn’t last, you know that not only won’t it last, but it is not supposed to, and so, you can appreciate it while it does. When you are down, you also know that it won’t last, and because of that, you can weather the low. If you are really down, know that your natural balance will soon bring you up. From a very high level perspective, you can now appreciate the downs, for you’ll know that each of life’s experiences are opportunities to appreciate the gifts that life bring us.

Therefore, next time you have a great day – or a “bad” one – appreciate it for what it is, know that it won’t last, and know that that perspective will put you well on your way to pursuing happiness.

Many of us walk around feeling like we have limited choices in many aspects of our lives. Take notice of how many times a day you say the words have to, should, and need to. Whenever you feel like you must do something, you’re in Level 1 energy – you’re a victim to your thoughts or circumstances.

In fact, when you’re faced with a task or something to do, there are five basic ways you can respond, and of them, only one is by full conscious choice. The five ways of responding are “I won’t,” “I have to,” “I need to,” “I want to,” or “I choose to.”

When you say “I won’t” do something, you’re saying that you have no power, that life happens to you, no matter what you do or believe. You don’t believe that you have a choice. You also don’t really think there’s anything in it for you – so why do it?

If you say “I have to,” you’re looking at the short term perspective. You “have to” complete the task in front of you, or else you will experience dire consequences. You feel forced to do it, and that you have very little to no choice.

The third response, “I need to” is a more powerful place to come from. Here, you’re aware of your choices and you seek to find the opportunity in the challenges presented to you. This perspective brings more chance of success, but it’s still destructive (or catabolic, but we will talk about that definition another time), because you don’t feel like you’re fully at choice.

career woman on desk

So these three responses involve either non-action, or action by force. Since you are not energetically bought into a situation, goal, or project, and because you are bringing destructive energy to it, you are also bringing a recipe for failure. So in these destructive levels, even though you may think you are choosing to do something, at your core, you chose not to do it, or not to do it well.

The next response, “I want to,” is constructive, because it indicates that you are mostly at choice. But, “want” still comes from a place of lack or absence.

The most powerful response is “I choose to.” When you respond this way, you feel you have complete choice. There’s a powerful connection between who you are and what you do.

So how do you get to choose to? Simply come from a place of having everything, and choosing to experience, rather than fill a need. Easy? Not at all, but you can choose to try it.

Here is QueenSuite’s RESET breakdown to help get you there.

Review & Realize

Get clear about your moods/feelings/emotions.

Check your options.


Choose whether your intention is destructive or constructive.


Figure out the smallest step you can take to redesign your career today. (Ex: Re-evaluate your budget. Give your network a gut check.)


Embrace your ability to make another choice!

Take action.

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